Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
