so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
