i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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