I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize