Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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