At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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