He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
