Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
