Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
