he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
i came on her dog
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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