Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize