I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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