Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
