so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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