Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Randomize
