yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Randomize