we're blogging at a bar
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Randomize
