3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
