She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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