Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
All I want is dick and wine.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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