Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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