You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize