His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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