i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize