We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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