I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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