I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
