love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
