your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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