fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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