just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i love accidental penises.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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