I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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