All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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