we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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