I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Randomize