remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
