med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
