she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
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