I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
