When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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