Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
