On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I'm too high and old for this...
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
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