I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Randomize
