if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
