Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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