i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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