Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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