Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
