there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
