Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Acid is not a monday night drug
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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