so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I can't put those talents on a resume
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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