Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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