Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
